it’s so difficult to describe [depression] to someone who’s never been there, because it’s not sadness, i know sadness. sadness is to cry and to feel. but it’s that cold absence of feeling—that really hollowed-out feeling. - j.k. rowling | via nina words borrowed + a picture revisited. this is the first step towards a longer story. the truth. a step that i’ve been considering for months. one that i’ve kept private out of fear. fear that i wouldn’t be able to make the leap from one job to the next if i admitted, publicly, that i’ve been living with severe depression for over a year. there, i said it. exhale. diagnosed three times because i didn’t believe the first or second doctor. i might have laughed at the third. because surely none of them know what i’ve accomplished over the past year. it’s true depression doesn’t look like sadness. compliments about my approach to life - calm, confident, graceful - have flowed. i suspect it’s different for everyone but for me - depression feels like an intolerable pressure. an implosion and explosion at the same time. confusing at best. the pressure has pushed me to keep moving in the form of you can do this you, you can take this. damn it. as james would say, i’ve been hustling. keep moving. sept 5th 2011.

it’s so difficult to describe [depression] to someone who’s never been there, because it’s not sadness, i know sadness. sadness is to cry and to feel. but it’s that cold absence of feeling—that really hollowed-out feeling. - j.k. rowling | via nina

words borrowed + a picture revisited. this is the first step towards a longer story. the truth. a step that i’ve been considering for months. one that i’ve kept private out of fear. fear that i wouldn’t be able to make the leap from one job to the next if i admitted, publicly, that i’ve been living with severe depression for over a year. there, i said it. exhale. diagnosed three times because i didn’t believe the first or second doctor. i might have laughed at the third. because surely none of them know what i’ve accomplished over the past year. it’s true depression doesn’t look like sadness. compliments about my approach to life - calm, confident, graceful - have flowed. i suspect it’s different for everyone but for me - depression feels like an intolerable pressure. an implosion and explosion at the same time. confusing at best. the pressure has pushed me to keep moving in the form of you can do this you, you can take this. damn it. as james would say, i’ve been hustling. keep moving. sept 5th 2011.

  1. becausemypenissaidso reblogged this from awelltraveledwoman
  2. depressie-depressief reblogged this from texturism
  3. 160cms reblogged this from awelltraveledwoman
  4. noraleah said: I’ve experienced depression at diff points in my life. Talk therapy & medication helped. Time helped. “The Noonday Demon” helped. I admire your courage & your ability to use the energy of the disease to create & work. I’m awed by it, actually.
  5. charliebravo said: beautifully written, as always, m. thank you for sharing. i feel certain this will give words to what many others may be feeling. thinking of you. xo
  6. ub14 said: sending you best wishes, texturism.
  7. justbreathecw said: thanks for sharing. it’s nice to know i’m not alone… good luck lady. i’ll be thinking of you.
  8. ipauk reblogged this from texturism and added:
    describes depression so perfectly. and yes. you are right. for everyone...different. but...
  9. rose-colored said: Well you look wonderfully and beautifully calm, you should know. Thank you for sharing.